I was in my bedroom folding laundry when I overheard this conversation between my daughter Gracie, 6, and my three sons, Tymon,8, Ranin, 4, and Tadin 2.
Ranin: "When I grow up I want to marry you."
Gracie: "You can't marry me, boys don't marry their sisters."
Ranin: "But I want to marry you."
Gracie: "No, if you marry your sister then your kids become weird."
Ranin: "No they don't."
Tymon: "Yes they do. Both their eyes will be on the same side."
Ranin: "No they won't."
Tymon: "Yes they will. Their mouth too. Everything will be on one side. Like Charlotte Pickles. Daddy said."
(Lion King Music playing in background.)
Ranin: "Oh I love the way that boy sings."
Tadin: "Heh eh dee wah! Heh eh weo!"
Tymon: "That's not a boy, it's Elton John."
Ranin: "Yes it is too a boy."
Tymon: "No, he's not a boy he's an old man."
Ranin: "He's a boy."
Tymon: "He is not, he's an old man, I saw his picture."
Gracie: "He is not an old man, he's just a man."
Tymon: "Dad's a man. An old man says, how you doin' sonny?"
Ranin: "Yeah, Dad's a man. And I'm a boy and you're a boy and he's a boy and she's a girl."
Gracie: "Yeah."
Tymon: "Us boys are male and you're a female."
Gracie: "We are not. Animals are male and female."
Tymon: "People are animals too.People are male and female. Dad's a male and he's a male and he's a male and I'm a male and you're a female. And mom's a female."
Gracie: "I'm a girl and Mom's a lady and Dad's a man and you are boys."
Tymon: "We're also male and female."
Gracie: "Why do we say male and female?"
Tymon: "I don't know."
Ranin: "Is George Washington alive?"
Tadin: "Dee WAH!"
Tymon: "No."
Ranin: "Is Abraham Lincoln alive?"
Tymon: "No."
Ranin: "Is George Bush alive?"
Tymon: "Yes."
Ranin: "Is he president?"
Tymon: "No, Bill Clinton is President."
Ranin: "Bill? Bill Spell?" (our landlord)
Tymon: "No, Bill Clinton. Mom, why did Bill Watterson stop making Calvin and Hobbes?"
Mom: (from the next room): "I guess he didn't want it to become boring."
Tadin: "Hey Mama."
Mom: "Hey Tay Tay."
Tadin: "Hey Mama."
Mom: "Hey Tay Tay."
Tadin: "Hey Mama."
Mom: "Hey Tay Tay."
Tymon: "I wish he didn't stop making it. I miss it. Do you think he would let me start drawing it?"
Mom, (from the next room): "I don't think so."
Ranin: "Come on Gracie, let's play. You be Nala and I'll be Simba. I want to sing the Simba song."
Gracie: "Oh I just can't wait to be king!"
Ranin: "Not that one, my Simba song. It goes Simba Simba Simba Simba. Simba Simba Simba Simba." (To the tune of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.)
Tymon:"Let's watch Jungle Book."
Ranin: "Was Mowgli a teenager?"
Tymon: "No he was a kid."
Ranin: "But was he a teenager?"
Tymon: "Some of the time."
Ranin: "Is Robin a teenager?"
Tymon: "I think so."
Ranin: "Are the Power Rangers teenagers?"
Tymon: "Yes."
Gracie: "In the Polar Bear King were the princesses teenagers?"
Tymon: "Yes."
Ranin: "The princesses' dad was a King. But the polar bear guy was a prince."
Tymon: "No, the dad was the king of the north and the polar bear guy was the king of the south."
Ranin: "No he was a teenager, he was a prince."
Tymon:"No he wasn't, he was a teenager king."
Ranin: "Teenagers aren't kings, they're princes."
Tymon: "He was a king."
Ranin: "He was a prince."
Tymon: "He was a king."
Ranin: "He was a prince."
Tymon: "He was a king."
Ranin: "He was a prince."
Tymon: Pow. "Aaahhhhh, Ranin punched me."
Ranin: Pow. "Aaahhhhh, Tymon punched me."
Mom: "Hey you guys, say sorry to each other. No fighting!"
Tymon: "Sorry."
Ranin: "Sorry."
Tymon: "King."
Ranin: "Prince."
Tymon: "King."
Ranin: "Prince."
Tymon: "Mom!"
Tadin: "HEY MAMA!"
Kimmy Sophia Brown has loved humor and music for as long as she can remember. She writes the column "From the Back Porch" as well as reviews of music in her column "MusicViews". Her goal in her music reviews is to introduce music she loves to people who may not have heard that particular artist or CD. For information about how to submit a CD for review, click here.